If you are a nerdy Psych major like me, you probably have the second word in mind for the blog title.
These few months, I significantly gained weight. I’m still considered thin but I can clearly see in photos that I really gained few pounds, and to a person like me who barely notice things like this is really considerable. Anyway, as all the women in the world, my self-image is damaged due to the stereotype of the fashion world. I see all these super skinny models in runways and in magazines, and I would realize that I am not like that, I can never be like that.
So as a Psych major (who I think are usually the common patients of this kind of thinking), I kinda have this twisted mind right now.
The guilt of eating too much has been bothering me for a month or two now. One evening, as I was alone in our house, I decided to try something. I put my fingers to my tongue as I face the lavatory and the moment my fingers touched my lips I realized, What the hell am I doing?! I was so grossed out with myself. And I hated that moment.
I cannot promise myself not to try it again because this crazy thought won’t just leave my mind! But I really hope this thought would just go away.
Even with all those advocates saying that everyone is beautiful no matter what do you look like, it won’t matter because it is always you, within you, that will say I am Beautiful.
That is from That’s So Raven! You go girl, that’s why I love this series since forever!
-December 15, 2012